College Football Week 1: Predictions Against the Spread

It is finally here! Opening weekend of College Football (aka the "Holiday" in my household) is upon us and that means the return of gambling on real football. This weekend is possibly the most wonderful time of the year. It is the one day of the season where every team still has that glimmer of hope for a perfect season. However, like my eventual position by the end of this long awaited day, half of these teams will fall flat on their faces. 

From my experience, picking against the spread for Week One is tough. There are just too many variables and five touchdown spreads. It can often feel like throwing darts made of yarn at balloons sprayed in Teflon. So, to conserve time, let's see if I can just say one sentence for each pick and hope that a corny joke can make those line-writing gods smile.

This will be my second season making predictions against the spread for the AP's Top 25.  Last year I finished with a 132-128-6 record (50.77%), which, in the long run, means absolutely nothing....

(Pick is the team in Bold)

No.1 Oklahoma (-23.5) vs. Tulsa:

I could be falling in love with the Boomer Sooner...However, it could be just because of this video.

No. 2 Alabama (-36.5) vs. Kent:

Unless its a bunch of Clark Kents, this game is going to be a laugher. 

No. 3 Oregon vs. No. 4 LSU (-1):

No one likes to be kicked while they are down....deep thoughts for JJ.

No. 5 Boise State (-3) @ No. 19 Georgia

Blue Cheese crumbles...so will this year's Blue Turf Warriors.  

No. 6 Florida State (-29.5) vs. LA Monroe

From the zero research that I have done, the Seminoles seem legit. This below-30 spread should be a breeze. 

No. 7 Stanford (-28) vs. San Jose State

The Spartans are going to need luck to win this game...both versions of the word.  

No. 8 Texas A&M (-15.5) vs. SMU

Kyle Padron has the ability to  hover around the top of the league in passing yards all year. This could be his come out game

No. 9 Oklahoma State (-36) vs. LA Lafayette

Love the name Ragin Cajuns...Don't like their chances in covering this spread.  

No. 10 Nebraska (-35) vs. Tennessee Chattanooga 

Didn't Terrell Owens go to this red-headed stepchild of a school? He is long gone and so are the Mocs chances in this one.

No. 11 Wisconsin (-35.5) vs. UNLV

Unfortunately, Vegas cant hit the lights on this game. However, Rebels still find a way to cover. 

No. 12 South Carolina (-21) @ East Carolina

Gamecocks....Insert your own perverted joke here.

No. 13: Virgina Tech (-25) vs. Appalachian State

Anyone who upsets Michigan can upset the world in my mind.

No. 14 TCU (-6.5) @ Baylor

No Andy Dalton means trouble for these Christians.

No. 15 Arkansas (-40) vs. SW Mississippi State

NCAA Football '12 list Arkansas as playing "FCS Northwest" in week one. Always a sign for a significant rout.

No. 16 Notre Dame (-10.5) vs. South Florida

I've been on the Golden Domers band wagon this offseason. Prove me right, Irish.   

No. 17 Michigan State (-34) vs. Youngstown State.

A Spartan massacres a penguin every time, without question.  

No. 18 Ohio State (-33.5) vs. Akron

The Zips can't hang, but the Buckeyes can't play fair. Picking Akron on pure spite.  

No. 20 Mississippi State (-27.5) @ Memphis

This is a tough one.  Let's go to the "magical coin" to decide. Heads the Bulldogs, tails the Tigers.   

No. 21 Missouri (-16) vs. Miami (OH)

I had a friend play for Miami (OH) in the late '90s. That's good enough for me to pull for the Red Hawks. 

No. 22 Florida (-35) vs. FAU

FAU to you, too!  But, seriously, the Gators win by at least 40.

No. 23 Auburn (-21) vs. Utah State

Auburn can survive at least one game without Cam Newton and Nick Fairley....right?

No. 24 West Virgina (-21) vs. Marshall

We are....going to lose...but still cover.

No. 25 USC (-21) vs. Minnesota

Trojans force the Gophers back into their hole. USC fans squeal in sanctioned delight.